Daily Theosophy

these are my children which I will never bear. They will never enjoy the inside of my body, never receive my warmth, and I will never see them being born and grow up. But it is okay. It is how things have to be – for some reason.

(126)

(shano’s offer)

Shano, when he was just seventeen, had offered her that if she wanted to go with one of his friends he would agree to that. They could still educate the children together if they came. That was really a great offer. He loved her only, and she loved him only. And silently he knew that it might be too much for his psychological stamina to see another boy do with her what he never could, what they never could. Would he be able to bear that? The idea alone was unbearable. Nevertheless he said it to her. And, honestly, it was really to his great relief when she refused the proposal pertinently. “Nobody else can take your place. I love you, and you only. No other man will ever touch me.” He might have had collapsed when it had actually happened.

A few years later, when he was 22 and she 25, he repeated the proposal in a more rational way. They were now ‘married’ in all respects, and accepted as such by everyone, and as a couple it was rational to have children. She refused again, with the same permanence and for the same reason.

The cause for this joint ordeal – they themselves didn’t know it, of course – was entirely different for Moimoi and Shano.

Shano had lived many lifetimes in a forest environment, though is was some thousands of years ago now, because the last few lives had been high up in the mountains far to the west – about which most people of the forest had not even heard. In the mountains Shano had been in contact with high culture and religion, and though he had forgotten all about his former lives in the present one, the essence of what he had learned had stuck to him, above rather than below his consciousness, but when stimulated, as when meeting and talking with the two men, his knowledge and intelligence in these field were quickly aroused.

Before that period he had lived many lives in a tropical forest that was comparable to where he had entered now – as an orphan this time. The basic structure of his character had always been the same through all these lifetimes, and this character became further and further developed. He had always been an energetic person who wanted to become the best in what he could do. He had always been adventurous and inquisitive. Also the seed of idealism had been with him throughout all these lifetimes, and these had sometimes been frustrated by the societies in which he lived.

Many times he had been an excellent hunter or an excellent warrior, or both. Being a hunter had given him a tremendous power of concentration and precision. Often he had been the best hunter without question of his village or group (when nomadic), in his younger years particularly. His mixture of concentration, willpower and direction to a high aim had caused his character to become ever stronger.

As a warrior he had been feared for his courage and his stamina never to let go of a set goal – usually he had been a winner, but he had been killed a few times also. But even that did not damage his inherent warrior character. One or two times he had been a king. But he was striving upwards along his own path rather than being caring and tolerant towards his subjects. The forest for him had the smell of power.

Many lifetimes were spent in the manly ways. It was in one of these lives that he had made an enemy. Out of sheer jealousy a man came to hate Shano. The men had a sly but strong will – like Shano he would never give up, not for the sake of his life even. But he could not get him down. He wanted to kill Shano by a trick. He failed, time and time again. But he told Shano that one day he would succeed. One day Shano would kill himself because of him. Shano had shrugged about it.

In still earlier lifetimes Shano had been a woman, usually a strong one, and in most cases she had earned considerable esteem in those matriarchal societies of the forests. Once she had been the mother of Moimoi, and a strong, unbreakable bond grew between them. She met her later as her or his brother, because Moimoi had known many male incarnations as well. Moimoi’s natural tendency had always been in the direction of helpfulness. She or he had always had a ray of love in her or his heart for all creatures who were suffering. Sometimes he/she had to experience that his/her good intentions were misused, and groups of people were against her/him or on his/her side sometimes and she/he had been desperate at times, escaping into use of drugs and self-destruction – in a sense he/she had been ahead in spiritual development compared to most people around, but had not had the force to stand up against the resistances of her social environment. She/he had had to pay for that also, and thus was several times born in miserable circumstances. Suffering combined with the inherent tendency to helpfulness had taught compassion.

In later periods Shano and Moimoi had often been man and wife, or close cooperators. There pathways had crossed many times. Moimoi too had lived in different environments in that part of the world.

The causes for their present joint ordeal were entirely different for Shano and her. In his previous lifetime, in the same forest, Shano, who always had wanted to be the most powerful,